Why I'm A Conservative...

(... and why you should be, too)

In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth... And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.

-- Genesis 1:1-2

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All right, maybe that's a little too over-dramatic. But, at one point in time, I was also without form, and void - politically.

The earliest memory I have of a politician is when President Nixon resigned in 1974. I was fourteen years old at the time. I can recall being very shocked, and very sad, at that turn of events. Not because I had any particular feelings about Nixon -- it was just a sad day for our nation. And let's face it, Nixon had a fairly sad life (although he was certainly NOT blameless in that).

Taking Nixon's place as president was Gerald Ford. Although not a native of Michigan, Ford did live in the state most of his life, so that got my attention, and helped to foster my admiration for him. That carried through to the election of 1976, where Ford ran unsuccessfully against Jimmy Carter. Mind you, at that point I had absolutely no clue what a liberal was, and what a conservative was. But I can honestly say that, as form of political protest, I did not eat peanut butter during the Carter administration (Reese's Peanut Butter Cups notwithstanding).

Then came 1980... and Ronald Reagan. This was the first time I would be able to vote for a President. Reagan sounded so unlike anyone I'd ever heard before in a political ad. He was warm, sincere, confident without being cocky, and didn't sound like he was talking down to you. He spoke about issues that went right to my soul: strength, national security, belief in the American spirit. Without mentioning them by name, he was addressing the weakness of Jimmy Carter, the corruption of the Nixon adminisration, and the tragedy that was the Vietnam War, and offering to lead us past all of that. He got my vote... twice. I never regretted those votes for a second, and looking back, I still don't. I feel that Reagan was unquestionably the finest president of my lifetime, and one of the four best presidents of the 20th century (the other being Truman and the Roosevelts... see, I do like some Democrats!).

I used to think it was so strange when I heard people say that they were a Republican or (shudder!) a Democrat because that's what their parents were. You see, my parents never discussed politics. And I really do mean NEVER. I'm sure my dad kept up on current events; it seems like my mother had her hands full running the household, although she did work from time to time. I know my mom was a registered voter, as I remember seeing her name on the precinct voter rolls after she had passed away. I don't know if my father has ever voted. It's only been recently that I discovered that MY experience is the one that's strange; more often than not, people DO tend to pick up their political leanings from their parents.

Many (maybe even most) blue-collar workers end up being Democrats because they are in labor unions, and unions tend to feed their members the old political myth that the Republican Party is for rich people, and the Democrats are for "the little guy". Well, I call bullshit. In truth, the Republicans are for getting government off the back of the average, hard-working American, giving each of us the OPPORTUNITY to be rich ourselves, if we're smart enough, fortunate enough, and willing to work for it. In contrast, the Democrats don't really want people to be self-sufficient; they like to paint the average American as victim of the evil corporations, who really can't make it without the help of the government (in this, I usually envision a bunch of little piglets, suckling at the government teat).

There are certain things that I feel the government should do. These are things that I cannot, in practicality, do for myself. Things like: provide safety and security, both domestically and internationally; provide a system of laws, and a means for enforcing and adjudicating those laws; provide infrastructure, such as roads, sewers, running water, and electricity.

On the other hand, there are plenty of things that government has no business putting their grubby little mitts on. These are things like universal health care and universal higher education. Now, before you think I'm a heartless bastard, please bear with me. I don't think children should suffer, regardless of the stupidity of their parents. I have no problem with the government providing health care to children, IF their parents cannot afford it. Although, let's be honest, if the parents are smokers, drink to excess, do drugs, or even hit the fast-food joints more than once a week, they probably CAN afford it, so they need to quit whining and cowboy up.

It all comes down to two words: Personal responsibility. You have no business asking anyone for help as long as you're not doing EVERYTHING you can to better your own situation. And even then, unless you have some sort of disability, it should be temporary, not an ongoing thing. In the short term, anyone can stumble, and might need a helping hand. I certainly have no problem with that. Long-term, though, if you're not making it, then you need to analyze your situation, and do something to change the game. Go back to school. Pick up a part-time job. Cut out extraneous things from your life.

This is what I recommend, and also how I live my own life. I don't sit around moping and bitching about how my life is miserable, and how I need the government to come fix things for me. I'm smart and industrious, with a strong spirit. I can take care of myself. Mainly, what I need the government to do is to GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY. Don't put unnecessary burdens on me. Don't take money out of my paycheck to pay someone else to sit on their fat ass, eating Ho-Ho's and pork rinds, and watching Oprah. I don't need any special laws favoring me; just let me be unfettered, that's all.

So, if you think my particular flavor of conservatism contains a dash or two of libertarian seasoning, you aren't really wrong. Remember, Ronald Reagan said that the nine scariest words in the English language are: "I'm from the government, and I'm here to help."